Friday, November 13, 2009

72 Virgins? Not for you two nitwits!

Looks like somebody's been skipping their Terrorist 101 classes. Give your life for the Jihad - Die in the name of Allah and you shall be rewarded in heaven with 72 virgins. That is how I understand the radical beliefs of Islam extremists fighting some holy war against the west. If I'm wrong, oh well - still makes for amusing fodder. Seems to me that in the past couple of weeks, two dudes have had the big virgin carpet yanked out from under their feet. But I will get to those dim bulbs in a minute. First, let's examine this crazy ass promise of the virgins in heaven - First, ya gotta ask yourself why did these chicks go to the great resting place in the sky as virgins? I'm thinking there is not a beauty pageant winner among them. Is it really going to be worth filling your Honda Civic or your fishing vest with TNT and taking the express lane to the big orgy in the sky? And call me nuts, but wouldn't the better promise be 72 wildly energetic nymphomaniacs with all kinds of know-how about things we could never imagine? Now you're talking about hitting the suicide bomber lottery.

Today I announce a tie for first place in the Loser of the Month Club:

The awards go to Nidal Malik Hasan and Tarek Mahanna. Since there is only one trophy, Nidal and Tarek have agreed to beat the shit out themselves with it until they are both dead and on the escalator to 72 Virgin Lane.

This first rant is really against Political Correctness - Let's think for a moment about Fort Hood, Texas and the Army Major who decided it was time to shoot up some Americans in the name of Allah. Did I spell that correctly? Oh wait a minute - that's right... I don't give a rat's ass. PS... that does not make me a racist or a hate monger - it simply means that I don't care if I spell the word for someone else's God correctly. In case you started to drift that way. Nidal Malik Hasan spent months online commuincating with Jihadist websites and Al Qaeda recruiters. He had business cards calling himself a Soldier of Allah. And the FBI was aware of all of this. But the government did nothing about it, most likely because the halestorm that would have surely followed, accusations of profiling and discrimination against Muslims. Um... near as I can tell, that would be like calling the arrest of Jeffrey Dahmer discrimination against people named Jeffrey. By the way, just to make myself clear: I am all in favor of discrimination against people plotting to destroy my country. I don't care if they are Muslim or Christian or Democrats or fukkin Fraggle Rock puppets. The liberally slanted media has jumped on board also and I heard this morning that society was gripped with "Islamaphobia." NO FUKKIN WAY ASSHOLES! This is not Islamaphobia... I call it "nutjobbomberphobia"... it's not new - has been around since the Revolutionary War. Chris "I'd Bang Obama If Michelle Would Let Me" Matthews actually had the balls to suggest that Hasan "calling up Al Qaeda" was not a crime. Um... an Army Major contacting the enemy IS A FUCKING CRIME YOU POMPOUS PRICK! It's called treason! I actually had an argument with some shithead small town politician last week about this. He asked me if the "many years of Hasan's honorable service to our country means nothing to me." Heehee... what do you think my answer to that was? Give you a hint - it included a few F bombs! He also suggested that Hassan's "shrink" is to blame for his suicide by MP because of his failure to treat his PTSD!! I shit you not - in this idiot's mind, Nidal Malik Hasan's brutal murdering spree in the name of Allah is explained away by a psychiatrist's lapse.

Side note: Not only did Hasan survive being shot, he now gets to wake up and find out that a woman filled his traitor ass with holes and ended his mission for Allah. Not only does he lose out on the virgins, his personal Jihad was cut short by a woman! Now if you want to define Poetic Justice, you can start there.

What's the other "No Virgins For You" story?

The "American" from Sudbury, MA who is being held charged with conspiracy to commit terrorist acts (by the way, his name is NOT John Smith) is being asked to be released on bail. This idiot and two other like minded shitheads had plans to enter terrorist training camps in the Middle East but that did not work out. Guess even the terrorists have rules about flat feet. So their Plan B was the murder of two members of the executive branch or to "shoot up mall shoppers." Guess they were trying to impress the Grand Poobah in charge of terrorist training camps. There is plenty of evidence that this asshat would have gone forward with his plans had he not been stopped. Yet, there they were - protesters outside the courthouse yesterday wearing shirts demanding Tarek Mahanna (which roughly translated means "They kicked me out of terrorist school because I'm from Sudbury") be released. His attorneys are actually saying he should be released on bail because he is an "unfit terrorist"... I'm telling you I can not make this shit up. Will it never end?

1 comment: