Saturday, June 19, 2010

As If I Needed Another Reason

They say the rest of the world cannot be wrong.  Well, I'm calling bullshit on that.  I don't care how many millions of people love the game of futbal (um, that's soccer to us regular sports watching Americans) - all I can see is that it is cross country running with boundaries and a purpose.  Near as I can figure, the object of the game is to kick as many opponents in the nuts as you possibly can.  The fascination continues to escape me.  You got your two clocks and it's anybody's fukkin guess what the real time is.  You got your red cards, your yellow cards and your Hamburger Helper gloves on the goalies.  Half of your players only have first names.  You got big plastic horns and your constant singing.  You got your John Madden of televised soccer and his one syllable GOOOOOOOOAAAAAAAALLLLLLLLL crap.  You have trampled crowds and collapsing stands.  And you got your hooligans who make Los Angeles Laker fans celebrating a championship look like kindergarten recess!

But yesterday, we also learned sure as hell that you got corrupt officials.  What kind of sport allows an official to waive off a goal, just because.  No reason given... just nope, I didn't like that goal, so you can't have it.  Maybe this asshat just despises the Americans because most of us like real sports.  But then when asked to explain it, he was given a pass.  He doesn't have to answer to anyone????  He just decided that he didn't want the Americans to win, so he can nullify a go-ahead goal and then NOT BE FORCED TO EXPLAIN HIS REASON??!!  What the fuck is that?  Any of you ball kickers out there care to explain to me how that can happen?  Anyone?  Pele?  Rolando?  Madonna?  Brittney?  Don fukkin King and the Vince fukkin McMahon have nothing on FIFA!!  Can you imagine if what would have happened if that call was made against Brazil or Columbia?  That official would not have made it to the sidelines before having a Vuvuzela horn shoved up his ass and a stomping of hooligan proportions.

So, yeah, the rest of the world watches soccer and appreciates it for it's fukkin beauty or something.  I say the rest of the world is WRONG!!!

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