Tuesday, June 26, 2012

Twofer Twosday: Susan Sarandon Senior Discount

Great news, ya assholes!   After having been incommunicado for a few days while soaking in the news of the world, I am back just in time for Twosday!  Youk was dealt to the pale hose for bag of balls and a fukkin yo-yo.  Miami Heat fans had their parade and nobody's face was chewed off (although someone oughta do Chris Bosh a favor and eat his hammerhead face to the bone so he could look better).  Jerry Sandusky is getting a new kind of shower love and deserves every fukkin moment of pain and suffering.  Obie was in Boston bragging about his White Sox getting Youk and charging $40,000 per idiot for dinner at a bistro.  So tell me, liberal blowhards... how many of those people paying 40 G are struggling middle class Americans that were victimized by "Bush's tax cuts for the wealthy"?   Are you fahkin' shitting me with this?  40 grand for pea soup and a filet!  Yeah, cuz THAT'S charitable spending. 

So anyhooz, I did mention that today was Twosday, right?  Well, time to go all cougar on your asses.  October 4th, 1946 was a Friday.  But it should have been a Twosday, I tell ya.  Cuz that's the day the good lawd gave us Susan Sarandon and started the groundwork on one fine pair of twins.  From parading around in her bra in Rocky Horror Picture Show to heating up the locker room in Bull Durham, Sarandon has had the eye of men for years.  Today, the lovely Susan is getting senior citizen coffee discounts and Medicare.  But I'll be damned if those girls of hers don't look fan-fahkin-tastic!!!  At 66, there's a little length to them... but come on!! 

Of course, I would be remiss if I did not offer this disclaimer:  Susan Sarandon's political viewpoints render her a jackass on this page.  She would have been happy to drop 40 thousand bucks on a plate of pasta in Boston yesterday.  But her other two viewpoints are strong enough to make one forget she's an Obamaholic.  So let's give Susan Sarandon a good old fashioned Shitz n Giggles right-sided, NRA loving welcome to the front page!!!  After all, it's all about the ta-tas.

Whoever came with the idea of hot actresses in low cut dresses kneeling down to put their hand prints on the sidewalks of Hollywood should be recognized as Man Club Dude of the Year!

Really?  This picture was taken when Sarandon was 54 years old!!  Sometimes, ya just have to believe in God, right?


 
Yes, Janet, that is Dr. Frankenfurter in those fishnets!

And again at 60!!!  Sir Isaac Newton was wrong!
So today, I have given Susan Sarandon TWO tests.  The first test is the tried and true t-shirt test.  Wish I had a gif file of her playing ping-pong, but a still will have to do.  Shirt should say "Motorboat New York."   She passed.


It is not often I get to use this test. But I guess when we start featuring cougars, we can pull out the greatest test of all... THE DNA TEST.  So, have you heard of Eva Amurri?  Um, she is the daughter of Susan and has the family genes!!!   MOOOOFAH! 

Eva Amurri

The apples don't fall far from the mamma apples!

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