Sunday, June 15, 2014

Happy Faahthahz Day, Ya Assholes!

The cat's in the cradle and the silver spoon, little boy blue and the man on the moon.  

What the fuk was Harry Chapin talking about?  What is the fukkin' cat doing in the cradle with a silver spoon???  And what on earth does it have to do with fathers?  How about something that makes sense when not trippin' on happy shrooms... like, the kid's in the cradle and Dad's in a trance, awake all night with shit in his pants.     See how I leave you guessing... is it the kid or Dad who has shit in his pants?  Holy Jeezus...I'm like Burt fahkin' Bacharach.  

Just a big HEY NOW to the dads out there waking up to breakfast in bed or a 9 am tee time or a finger painted card that looks like a crayon box puked on some construction paper!  It's our day, boys!  So set yer hard workin' ass down, sip that coffee and give the nads a healthy scratch!  Today, you own the remote and the fridge.  Today, you are a Profile Pic and a George Strait song.  You are a hero and an inspiration.  Today, your kids thank you for the leather belt to the ass because it made them a better person.  Today, you are the shit!  Enjoy it... because tomorrow, you gotta go back to work and get pissed on by your boss.

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