Wednesday, July 8, 2015

Steven Tyler Swings And Misses At Country Music

Brace yourselves country music fans!!  The Crypt Keeper has been threatening us with a crossover to "country" for months.  Well, his first official "country" video has been released and his wild Cecil Fielder kinda swing at Music Row not only missed by a mile, but the overrated rocker spun around and landed on his boney heroin emaciated ass.  Not that we are surprised, but this is about as close to country music as Charlie Manson is to freedom.  And the sad thing here is that the song is actually pretty good.  His voice sounds solid and I like the music.  But it ain't fukkin' country, Mr. Tyler.

Check out the video - he made sure to include all the ingredients of today's country music videos.  There's a closeup of his cowboy boots, a pretty lady in an open field and a blue sky.  But fuk... just partying around a bonfire or standin' in front of a wooden shack or rollin' up in a rusty ol pickup truck doesn't make it a country song.  Beers and moonshine and skinny dippin' in a moonlit crick.... THAT'S a country video!   While he gets some credit for the banjo and harmonica, he loses all of that with his painted fukkin' nails and his pirate shirt.

Take my advice, Stevie boy... re make this video with a half nekkid chick on a Jaguar, call it rock and roll and you will have yourself a hit.


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