Friday, January 8, 2016

Nah, I'd Rather Not Pet Your Pit Bull


On Sunday, this 9 year old boy died after he was mauled by his sister's three pit bulls in their trailer in Yuba County, California.  He had been left alone with the dogs when his 24 year old sister left for work.  "She really had no idea that these dogs would be violent," said her attorney.  "She had no reason to believe that these dogs would be a threat to her younger brother."  The grieving sister said her brother Tyler "loved those dogs.  He laid with them. He played fetch with them.  He ran around the yard playing like a little boy and they followed him."


In Tennessee last month, a man adopted a 5 year old Rottweiler from a humane society in the town of Jackson.  Took little poochie home and was promptly attacked and killed by said rotty.  Sorry, but you cannot color me shocked here.  And with even more apologies to my friends who own or support pit bulls and rottweilers, these are bad breeds.  Relax....I'm not saying YOUR dog is a bad dog.  I'm saying it's a bad breed.  There really can be no argument.

Oh I know, I know.  You have all kinds of cute little stories to share about your lovable, sweet little pet.  And I know the large majority of these dogs never kill anything larger than a laser pointer light on the kitchen floor.  But spare me the old "It's not a bad dog.  It's a bad owner." argument.  Can you tell me then why so many bad owners buy pit bulls?  And why are sheep dogs and golden retrievers only owned by good owners?

I know this is going to piss some people off, but numbers are numbers.  According to the AKC, there are 339 officially recognized breeds of dogs.  Yet, pit bulls and rottweillers account for 74% of dog related fatalities.  In other words, the other 26% of dog related fatalities are divided up among 337 breeds.  There are breeds that when they snap, they bare their teeth, growl and bark to scare you.  Some might even nip at your hand or leg and even draw some blood.  Other breeds, when they snap, they piss on your scatter rug.  And some never snap at all.  And then there are breeds that when they snap, their biology turns them into blood letting killers. There is no middle ground for pit bulls and rottweilers.

Yes, I know they are pets.  And they have feelings.  And a voice that cannot be heard.  They are a misunderstood breed.  Blah blah blah.  I've seen all the hokey comments during Pit Bull Appreciation Month.  I've seen all the adorable pictures of pitties snuggling with babies.  I get it.  You love them.  To be clear, I do not hate pit bulls or rottweilers, I am afraid of them.  I don't trust them.  And it does not matter how many stories I hear about how your pit bull lived a full life and never attacked a soul, the breed frightens the shit out of me.

Sorry, but deez are da fax.
  • In 2013, pit bulls killed 26 people, 13 of whom were under the age of 7, including a 21 month old and a 14 month old.  So while you laud the lovability of your pooch, you gotta understand why that family crossed the street yesterday when they saw you walking Hercules down East Avenue.
  • In 2014, there were 42 dog bite related fatalities.  27 of those were at the jaws of a pit bull (4 killed by rottweilers).  So, TWO breeds were responsible for 74% of all dog related fatalities.  
  • By the way, that statistic is consistent - pit bulls and rotties were responsible for 74% of ALL dog bite fatalities from 2005 through 2014.  
  • In that same 10 year period, pit bulls have killed 203 Americans.  That is one citizen every 18 days.  
THAT is why we cross the street when we see you coming.  THAT is why we leave the dog park when you show up.  THAT is why we are rescuing chocolate labs and Great Danes and Peek-a-Poos and even those fukkin' loud mouthed beagles.  I'm happy you love your pitty or your rotty.  But I ain't pettin' it.

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